In Between what?

I've found some of the sweetest moments in life have been those in between

other moments known for their grandeur.















Thursday, January 23, 2014

Better late than Never

I said I was going to write about resolutions right after New Year’s, but I never got around to it-until now.  I love resolutions, so I set a few each year.  I ask Skip every year to set some with me and he just flat out refuses.  I am so very goal oriented that having an excuse to reflect and set new goals is just exciting to me.  What I realized this year, however, is that I could not remember even one resolution from last year (except to lose weight, which has been a daily resolution of mind since around 1990).  This is partly why I want to share them (even three weeks late).  At least next year I can look back at this and see how I did.   I set five goals really doable goals: 1) get up before school for quiet time reading and praying 2) memorize a verse a week 3) be intentional-especially in my interaction with those who are grieving 4) eat cleaner/healthier foods 5) get pregnant. 

So far, I’ve had no luck with numbers one and five.  I want so badly to get up before school to spend some quiet time reading and in prayer, but I just can’t  won’t make it a priority.  I’ve been getting it in after school or before bed most days, and I even enlisted a friend for accountability after our pastor suggested we do so in a sermon recently.  So, it’s not a total fail, but it’s not something I feel like I’ve got a handle on yet either.  As far as pregnancy goes, yes, we’ve tried “that.”  Whatever “that” you’re tempted to suggest, we’ve tried it.  I think a few guys actually read some of these posts, so I won’t go into detail with all we’ve tried.  Let’s just say my husband is a trooper!  In all seriousness, if you’d add this one to your prayer list, we’d be grateful.

Numbers two and three have been a real source of joy for me.  I’ve chosen verses that really speak to my circumstances right now and memorizing them has come fairly easy.  I put them on our fridge, in my bathroom, and on my file cabinet at school.  So far, I’ve memorized Psalm 9:10, Proverbs 31: 25-26, and Isaiah 40:28-29.  Funny enough, memorizing the verses has helped me with being intentional.  I’ve been able to share these verses with a few people who I thought could use them for various reasons. 

Just this week, Skip and I got serious about improving our eating habits.  I have been trying to lose the baby weight for a while now and was very successful before the holidays.  After Christmas, I had to re-lose a few pounds and just when I got those off, we went to Disney, so this week was our week to jump in with both feet.  Skip has been complaining about needing to lose a few pounds for a while, and I am still up about ten pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight.  I got really interested in Dr. Oz’s two week plan, but did not think it sounded realistic for Skip.  No meat and no grain (other than a ½ cup of rice which Skip does not enjoy) sounded too restrictive and I didn’t think he’d stick with it.  So, we’re following a lot of Dr. Oz’s suggestions and the Weight Watcher “kick start” plan.  We’re eating very little sugar and processed foods and lots of fruit and veggies.  Skip has been swamped with work and church stuff this week, but he’s really gotten into the plan.  He’s lost 6lbs already and says he feels better already.  The more I read, the more I know that we need to cut the crap out of our diet.  I don’t ever want to be so strict that I can’t indulge (in coffee. and creamer. every morning.), but I do want to make better choices and be less stupid when it comes to what I put in my mouth. 


All in all, the resolutions are going well. Second semester started today, and I even set some goals for my new classes.  Having goals to work towards gives me something to focus on and keeps my mind busy.  It makes me feel more like my old self, and that’s good, too.   

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Welcome to the World


I’ve written before about the two blogs I started following soon after Levi died.  They’re so different, but so good and encouraging in their own right.  To recap, Deeper Still is by a Christian mom (Larissa) in Australia who delivered a sleeping baby girl on January 30th, 2013 and less than 11 weeks later got pregnant with her rainbow baby.  I loved her positive attitude throughout her subsequent pregnancy and the scripture she claimed to get her through. 

This morning I received incredible news in the form of a personal email from Larissa.  Her baby got here yesterday safe and sound, and you won’t believe what she named him- Levi.  Her email quite literally took my breath away.  She wanted to tell me personally about the name before I read it on her blog.  She said they picked it out early in pregnancy and since they are those kind of (crazy) people who do not find out the sex of their babies until birth, they weren’t sure if they’d use the name or not.  She said when she heard about our Levi, it made her love the name even more.  We loved the name Levi so much that we mourned the loss of it right along with everything else we’d planned.  I’m so glad they chose it and thought of us.

As a new babylost mom, I didn’t know what to do with all of the baby stuff.  I remember trying to have conversations with mom and Skip while we were still in the hospital about the car seat and clothes and all the stuff we weren’t going to need.  They assured me I had time to make those decisions, and they were right.  We slowly sorted things to return and things to keep for (hopefully) future children.  I was the saddest about the little things that were monogrammed with his name or initials.  They were SO cute and such personal gifts and they would never be used.  I cried and cried over this and put them away in our box of memories, away from the other clothes and stuff for the future. 

As I was driving home from church this morning, it hit me.  I want to send those monogrammed things to little Levi Genet all the way in Australia.  I want his mom, my friend I’ve never met, to enjoy them as I would have with my Levi.  I want her to send me pictures of her little guy wearing a hat made for my little guy.  I’ve been so blessed and gotten so much hope for our future reading about her life and her faith. I could never just get rid of them, but I will be happy to pass them along to someone who has felt my pain and now experienced the joy I long for.  Her email filled me with hope that one day I will experience the same.


Welcome to the world, Levi William Genet.  Mamas all over the world are so glad you’ve made it!