What is Life?

One of the perks of teaching high school is staying up on the most recent/popular lingo.  A few weeks ago, Megan and I entertained some of the girls on the trip to Joyce Meyer by teaching them the latest kid slang.  “What is Life” is a very popular saying among them currently.  It can be used when a teacher assigns more than a reasonable amount of homework for one night, someone dumps someone else a week before prom, or when the snack cart runs out of Reece cups.  This past week, I have found myself saying it more than once about my life and the events of the past four days.

A week ago today my friend Emily called and asked me a life-altering question (and I am in no way being dramatic).  Emily has been involved in a ministry called Rise Up for a while now and has had the opportunity to mentor several girls who’ve recently come out of dangerous situations.  (It’s an awesome, worthwhile ministry and I’m so proud of the work she does for them). While I was pregnant with Levi, Emily was working with a pregnant teenager she met through the ministry.  Lots of people had given us things for our baby that we either didn’t think we’d need or already had, so one summer afternoon Emily brought this young woman to our house to pick up some stuff for her soon-to-be-born baby.  All in all, we probably spent two hours with her and had not seen her since.

So, you can imagine my surprise Sunday afternoon when Emily asked if Skip and I would consider taking Mama K’s baby for a while so she could get on her feet.  She had decided that she needed to make some changes but knew she couldn’t take care of Baby A while trying to make a new life for herself.  She explained to Emily that the only people she could even think about leaving her baby with were Emily’s friends Skip and Stephanie.  (You know, that she spent 2 hours with last summer).

Skip wasn’t even home for us to discuss this together, but I knew I really didn’t have to ask Skip to know his answer.  A few months ago, Skip and I spent some time discussing and investigating the possibility of becoming Foster parents.  Before we lost Levi, we’d never had any conversations about fostering or adoption.  But then, we found ourselves with empty arms and a full nursery.  It seemed like I was hearing all the time about how many children are in the foster care system and how few Christian families step up to help.  We ultimately decided that although we were interested, the timing of trying to get pregnant again while fostering (and possibly giving back) children was not something we could undertake.  But then Emily called and this mama had asked for us by name, and I couldn’t even hesitate.  Every reason that I thought of to say no (a girls’ weekend in the works, my need for a regular schedule, summer vacations, etc.) was just a shallow, worldly reason that I couldn’t even say aloud without feeling like a loser.  So, we agreed to meet with Mama K the following Tuesday. 

Then Monday night, Emily called and asked if we could possibly move the meeting up a few days.  Mama K needed to go ahead and change residences and Emily and the Rise Up director agreed that the sooner we met and took Baby A, the better.  We pent the next few days pulling out stuff we’d packed away and enlisting the help of our (AMAZING) friends to gather toys, and diapers, and car seats.

Friday afternoon, Emily, Mama K, and Baby A arrived at our house.  What could’ve been (and we fully expected to be) awkward was more like a family reunion.  The baby came to us easily, loved the toys we’d put out for her, and we, of course, fell in love immediately.  Mama K wanted us to take some pictures all together before she left.  I came away from our time together with an understanding that this is a temporary arrangement.  Baby A has a good mama.  She’s been loved and cared for the first 8 months of her life. Mama K asked us to take care of Baby A not because she is a bad mom but because she wants to be a better mom.  Her goal is to be ready to take Baby A back by her first birthday and Skip’s 34^th (they share the same birthday!).  We think that is a realistic goal and although we know it will be hard to say goodbye to this girl who’s already stolen our hearts, we know she’ll be going back into capable hands.  But until then, we are getting all the practice we can doing this parenting thing.